This morning my love and I exchanged text messages stating how grateful we were that we were not imbibers. This morning I felt like I had a hangover anyway, that's what crying can do to you. Puffy eyes and a sharp headache were the gifts of released sorrow at 3 am that was an accumulation of lots of emotions.
Thayne has been participating in a summer trial for Destination Imagination. I had been there observing his work and how well he was doing. I wasn't sure at first if he would be a good fit, then I watch how he blossomed with the challenges and how his creative mind was loving it. We started attending at the first part of June and the trial period ended last week. He loved creating an article of clothing out of newspaper and duct tape, then displaying his team's creation, they worked with simple machines and learned how to present themselves and a subject. I was surprised and impressed with how he rose to the tasks.
Unfortunately, the program is about competition and winning is the end all be all. The rejection email came yesterday from the leadership team.
"Realizing the full scope of what a competitive DI team entails, we feel
that it would be a frustrating year for Thayne and the other team
members. We want his DI experience to be a positive one, and for his
learning to be joyful, and recognize that a competitive DI team will
likely not provide that environment. As such, we have determined not to
invite Thayne to a team this year." Part of the email read.
Thayne took this very hard and my momma heart is so sad for him. Rejection, unfortunately is part of life and I can't take away his sadness. So all night he was saying things like, " they think I am stupid" and " I tried so hard but I will never be good enough".
One of the women on the leadership team is a lady from our church. She and I have not been seeing eye to eye on several things in cub scouts and other areas. She sent an email to other people in church behind my back about how I disciplined Thayne weeks ago at cubs scouts and she did not agree, thinking that I was being too harsh. I am trying so very hard to believe that she was fair with all of this, but I fear not.
After raising 4 other kids, you would think that I would have all the answers to soothe my boy. I don't. It is really crappy being rejected. Parenting is hard. The world is hard. All I can do is let him know he really did his best and really that is all any of us can do.